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The Client Experience

Why It’s a Good Thing That Client Didn’t Hire You – Wedding Industry Consultations

January 21, 2020

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Yes, you read that title right! I wanted to start off with a blog post that puts you in the right frame of mind for your booking season. And today, we're going to talk about wedding industry consultations.

Today, I want to talk about why it's a good thing that the client you met with didn't hire you.

Before I tell you why, let me start off with a typical scenario…..

Your inbox dings and a new email comes in from a couple who loves your work. They're getting married at a fabulous location, have a respectable budget, and can't wait to set up a time to meet with you.

So far, so good!

You schedule a consultation and the meeting goes flawlessly; you're laughing, joking, sharing stories and might even have a friend or family member in common. The conversation was so easy, so effortless, and so fun that by the end of the consultation you are hugging each other goodbye and they're thanking you for your time.

They say, “send us over that proposal and contract so we can get started!” When they leave, you chest bump yourself for a job well done. Yaaasssss!

You rush over to your computer and layout the most spectacular proposal of service.


You're so pumped that you have your favorite vendors on speed dial to tell them about this “amazing” referral you're going to have. If you're a wedding designer, you already have their entire design proposal drafted out in your mind and you can see those glittering chandeliers (you know, those ones you've been wanting to use) hanging in some spectacular tent, swathed in expensive Italian fabric.

Worse, you're already counting dat money. Whether you need it to pay off a debt, send your family on vacation, or treat yo' self to that new bag– it's already spent.


You send off the most exquisite proposal/contract known to man and wait for the signature and deposit. Talk about ending your day on a good note!

Except you don't hear back from them. A day or two passes– and you might not have even noticed– so on the third day, you check-in.

Hmmm. Maybe they didn't receive it?

“Hey guys! So wonderful to meet with you both. I really enjoyed getting to you know and learning about your wedding. I just wanted to follow up with you on the proposal to ensure you received it. Please let me know if you have any questions. I'd be happy to jump on the phone if a call is easier.”



No response.

If you're lucky, in a few days, you'll get an email that says, “Thank you so much for your time. We loved meeting with you, but we've decided to go in a different direction.”

{insert WTF face}

Different direction?! What do you mean, different direction? The only direction points right here!

But here's the thing: those clients, they did you a favor. They made a choice, based on whatever criteria they set out to meet, and it wasn't you. They chose what was best for them.

I know that can be a hard pill to swallow and it sounds all nice and neat, but it is the truth. In this business, we want the right clients to hire us; clients who see the intrinsic value we offer, appreciate our level of service and want our unique creativity.

Many clients are motivated by price and you can't escape it; people are conscious of what they spend– I know I am! Perhaps you were more than they had budgeted so they went with a cheaper option, knowing that it wasn't as good, but was the right fit monetarily for them.

Even worse, perhaps someone quoted them an obscene price that is way lower than yours and to them, they couldn't justify your cost since the competitor was so much lower.

I don't know about you, but I don't want my company to be the “splurge” purchase. That gets sticky, and icky, and clients come up with the most unreasonable expectations. Why? Because in their eyes, they've paid you so much money. Yuck! No thanks!

Or maybe, just maybe, they found a better overall fit based on personality, style, and price. Either way, don't take it personally. They were not the right fit for your business.

I also believe in the magical powers of the universe and that if we don't get an opportunity, its because something else is right around the corner– you just don't know what that “something” is yet.

So don't feel defeated, don't feel like you've failed and for God's sake, don't count the money before it hits the bank!

This no you got? It has nothing to do with your talent, your ability or your worth.

If you're noticing that this is happening too often, it might be because you're attracting the wrong people. Learn more about how my Client Cocktail can help you call in better clients.

Explore More Wedding Industry Resources

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  1. Vera says:

    This was a very good read, so much so that I chuckled through the the WHOLE article..including making the face…good to know I’m not the only one…thank you for the positive reinforcement, and I am really looking forward to reading more.

  2. Yup. All that. I’ve been all about letting go after the proposal is sent after 48 hours. I have trained myself to move on because it has ALWAYS worked out for the best. I consider each interview & proposal practice for what’s next and walk away happy with that. It’s easier on our hearts and minds with this perspective.

  3. “Insert WTF face”. Yup. But I just have to keep the faith that another one will come along that fills the shoes even better. Thanks for a great read.

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